speech

I am apparently horrible at verbal communication,
especially in loud environments,
with my
small
lisping
voice muted by the crashing orchestra
of sharp noise,
and the roaring clamor
of metallic bass
pounding at surrounding
space.

I am evidently awful at written communication,
especially in loud environments,
with my
self-conscious internal flagellation
and
over indulgent serial contemplations
of the delivery
and formations
of my insufficient speaking,
spilling,
leaking
from my mind onto paper or a screen
... Blank.

I know not what to write
that won't come out contrite or sorry,
they say not to worry 
but how can one not 
when you've sought 
to convey a thought
but all that you say is naught
... not... naught...
Nil and still,
immobile
docile 
weakly seeking
to transcend the realm of thought
to speaking
or at the very least peeking
from behind the heavy curtain of abstraction...
is such a violent extraction
from the 
Awkward,
Inarticulate, 
and seldom Understood.